gledo sam neki standup ovog morona, nije los
:
- I like to read the Bible in public places so people are watching me read it, and I just like to murmur out to myself...Oh bullshit!!
- I like to go the Olive Garden by myself on Saturday night and have the waiter sing the Happy Birthday song to me...and just sit there and cry
- my girlfriend looks a little like Charlize Theron... and a lot like Patrick Ewing
- Whenever i am with a woman I like to whisper softly in her ear. "Touch my vagina." and she's like "What?!" and I'm like that's what your supposed to say.
- My sister was recently diagnosed with multiple personalities... yesterday she called me... and my caller ID exploded.
- My southern accent starts to come out a little when I drink. Like I'll say "Y'all" or "Niggers" or things like "Y'all niggers git away from me
- What is it Noam Chomsky used to say about eating pussy?
- Using the N-word is wrong, but I did use the term “Sand nigger once… Not, like, as in to demean Arab people or something. I said “Get off the sand nigger, volleyball’s a white man’s sport.
- And finally, I dream of moving to India, or Pakistan, and becoming a cabdriver.