kakav je novi candlemass?? slusao neko?
ja sam samo ovu recenziju procitao.
After 50 years of unemployment, Candlemass - legendary doom band and doomiest band in the world - has finally reunited to put together a brand new super album of pure doom and woe! Everyone in the world is excited, and I have had the unique privilege of hearing the album for free before it was even released. I did this by downloading it. With a download speed of 100kb/sec, the entire album was in my hard drive within minutes, completely free of charge, while most other suckers have to wait for the thing to be released, then go through the time, hassle and waste of money by purchasing the album. I am truly the king, and this doom band is truly doomed (LOOOOLMAOFLING) because of my lack of support!
The album opens up with Black Dwarf - a rather racist song that takes the listener through a fictional fantasy tale about the misadventures of an African-American dwarf. With a somewhat racist message, singer Messiah is metaphorically implying that black people are small compared to the superior White people. It could also be a protest against Tolkien, and all his wannabes who write about the same thing, over the severely racist lack of dwarfes with African origins in fantasy novels. It is unclear exactly what the song is about. I would have to listen to the lyrics before being 100% sure. In this song, Candlemass prove themselves to be the worlds fastest doom band. Never before has a doom band played at 140 beats per minute like this. They also prove to be the only doom band to make use of an Iron Maiden chorus for their own chorus. They are also the only doom band playing happy fantasy music, somewhat comparable to Rhapsody. They might actually be the only doom band in the world that doesn't play doom? If I hadn't been as well educated about what band plays what genre as I am, I might have gone as far as to not think that this was a doom song. But I am, and it is.
There are also other songs on the album, but I don't need to listen to them. However, by looking at the title of the second song, they prove themselves to also be the only doom band inspired by Helloween, ever. They also seem to be the only doom band ever to exist that has recorded an album with no atmosphere whatsoever. But that's not all! They're also the only doom band who can keep playing after having split up forever, for all eternity, ever. All in all, Candlemass is a very unique doom band.
There is one really great feature about this album that makes it stand out from many others: the Swedishness of the band. They truly excel in the art of being from Sweden, which is not an easy thing since the odds of ending up being born in Sweden must be quite low given the ratio of Sweden's population to the global population (1:87148012740124789054789340859870938932578593409545983451 according to the latest Swedish statistics). For this reason, I give them a top score of 37 trolls out of 37 possible, as you do with all Swedish artists.
