tema za pedere i dukatlije (random)

[Kent]

 

ja ga rasirio i po kg-u... max, lemi i kompanija moraju da ga slusaju zbog glasanja

 

ruzice, ruzo ruska...

[azal]

Little Known Chuck Norris Facts:

 

1. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

 

2. Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.

 

3. Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

 

4. Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

 

5. When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail his family does not die from cholera or dysentery, but rather roundhouse kicks to the face. He also requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on his back. He always makes it to Oregon before you.

 

6. Chuck Norris lives by only one rule: No Asian Chicks.*

 

7. The original theme song to the Transformers was actually "Chuck Norris--more than meets the eye, Chuck Norris--robot in disguise," and starred Chuck Norris as a Texas Ranger who defended the earth from drug-dealing Decepticons and could turn into a pick-up. This was far too much awesome for a single show, however, so it was divided.

 

8. Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't fuck with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.

 

9. Chuck Norris once went to a frat party, and proceeded to roundhouse every popped collar in sight. He then drank three kegs and shit on their floor, just because he's Chuck Norris.

 

10. A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name is "Charles". Chuck Norris did not respond, he simply stared at him until he exploded.

 

11. Chuck Norris can make a woman climax by simply pointing at her and saying "booya".

 

12. Chuck Norris once shot a German plane down with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

 

13. Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.

 

14. To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and aquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong.

 

15. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

 

16. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

 

17. Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with five times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer. This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.

 

18. When Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, Chuck said, "Don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."

 

19. At the end of each week, Chuck Norris murders a dozen white people just to prove he isn't a racist.

 

20. Chuck Norris doesn't have normal white blood cells like you and I. His have a small black ring around them. This signifies that they are black belts in every form of martial arts and they roundhouse kick the shit out of viruses. That's why Chuck Norris never gets ill.

 

21. Chuck Norris took my virginity, and he will sure as hell take yours. If you're thinking to yourself, "That's impossible, I already lost my virginity.", then you are dead wrong.

 

22. Chuck Norris frequently signs up for beginner karate classes, just so he can "accidentally" beat the shit out of little kids.

 

23. Chuck Norris punched a woman in the vagina when she didn't give him exact change.

 

24. Chuck Norris found out about Conan O'Brien's lever that shows clips from "Walker: Texas Ranger" and is working on a way to make it show clips of Norris having sex with Conan's wife.

 

25. Chuck Norris once tried to sue Burger King after they refused to put razor wire in his Whopper Jr., insisting that that actually is "his" way.

 

26. Chuck Norris ruins the endings of Harry Potter books for children who just bought one for the hell of it. When they start crying Chuck Norris calmly says, "I'll give you something to cry about," and roundhouse kicks them in the face.

 

27. You remember when you were playing the game Oregon Trail and you came Christopher Cross the Snake River that was 2 foot deep, you decide to cross it and you lose 3 wagon wheels, one child and your wife was diagnosed with Parvo and they blamed it on Wagon Robbing Indians? Yeah that was Chuck Norris, he fucking robbed you, drowned your child with numchucks and gave your wife herpes. Chuck Norris Owns you.

 

28. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

 

29. Chuck Norris has every copy of National Geographic in his basement. He also has the ability to lift every single one of them at once.

 

30. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

[Demigod]

Opasan je on,ali video bi' ga protiv super gotha:

[Fiery]

Little known facts about Vin Diesel:

 

When Vin Diesel drinks pee, his asparagus smells funny.

 

Vin Diesel was scheduled to be Stalone's stunt double in Rambo, but he was replaced after refusing to wearing a parachute when jumping from the plane.

 

If you rearrange the letters in Vin Diesel it reveals his credo: "I End Lives."

 

Crop circles are Vin's way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fuck down.

 

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Vin Diesel allows to live.

 

When Vin Diesel was born, the nurse said, "Holy crap! That's Vin Diesel!" Then she had had sex with him. At that point, she was the third girl he had slept with.

 

There is no "I" in team. There are two "I"s in Vin Diesel. Fuck you, team.

 

When Vin Diesel goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

 

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Vin Diesel could use to kill you, including the room itself.

 

Vin Diesel coined the phrase, "I could eat a Horse" after he ate every last unicorn in existence.

 

Vin Diesel has always been able to find Waldo, except for one time. He found himself stumped on the last page of Where's Waldo Now?, not being able to find the Waldo without a shoe. He threw the book down and screamed, "This is BULLSHIT!" They're all wearing shoes." He then proceeded to eat the book and exclaim, "IF I CAN'T FIND WALDO, THEN NO ONE CAN!" The book he ate belonged to a child that he had borrowed it from. The child began to cry and Vin ate him for good measure. The incident has since been refered to as Christmas.

 

Vin Diesel once walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors.

 

Vin Diesel is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

 

Vin Diesel has two speeds: walk and kill.

 

When Vin Diesel jumps into a body of water, he doesn't get wet. The water gets Vin instead.

 

Vin Diesel is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

 

Vin Diesel once beat Super Mario Bros 3 without even touching his Nintendo controller. He just yelled at his TV in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich, and the game beat itself out of fear.

 

Vin Diesel doesn't believe in rubber condoms. Instead, he sticks his penis in a girl, and uses that girl as a condom while fucking another.

 

Vin Diesel can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

 

Vin Diesel was the hunter who shot Bambi's Mother. He then wore her carcass like it was a coat while he made his rounds at the local children's hospital.

 

If you were to lock Vin Diesel in a room with a guitar, a year later you would have the greatest album ever, it would sweep the Grammy's. When asked why he doesn't do this Vin replied "Because Grammy's are for queers." Then he ate a knife to show the seriousness of his response.

 

You are what you eat. That is why Vin Diesel's diet consists entirely of bricks, steel, and the tears of small children.

 

Vin Diesel is not lactose intolerant, he just refuses to put up with lactose's shit.

 

In fine print at on the last page of the Guiness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Vin Diesel, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone has ever come to matching him.

 

Vin Diesel once ate the entire cake at a bachelor party before anyone could tell him there was a stripper in it.

 

Vin Diesel can divide by zero.

 

It takes 14 puppeteers to make Vin Diesel smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.

 

On his birthday, Vin Diesel randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.

 

The eternal conundrum "what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object" was finally solved when Vin Diesel punched himself in the face.

 

Vin Diesel played Russian Roulete with a fully loaded gun and won.

[Demigod]

Ovo je smehotresno.

[Fiery]

Little known Mr T facts:

 

Mr. T speaks only when necessary. His main form of communication is folding his arms and slowly shaking his head. And regardless of the situation, he is always understood.

 

Why does Mr. T wear still have his mohawk? Cause his reflection pities the fool who don't!

 

Mr. T invented fools. Realizing the magnitude of his folly, he then created Pity.

 

Who let the dogs out? Mr. T did, that's who. What the hell are you going to do about it?

 

Mr. T survived a roundhouse kick to the face from Chuck Norris. He was the first and only one to do so.

 

Mr. T's incredible greatness has been attributed to the fact that his genetic code doesn't have any A, G, or C. His genetic code is in fact, nothing but T's.

 

23. That's the number of people Mr. T has pitied in the time it has taken you to read this sentence.

 

Before Mr. T, the alphabet only had 25 letters.

 

Mr. T's edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.

 

Mr. T is allergic to doorknobs. That's why he can only kick through doors.

 

Mr. T doesn't obey the second law of thermodynamics. It obeys him.

 

Mr. T's hair style is actually a complex array of antennas that can triangulate the exact location of any fool in the universe. His gold chains can then transmit pity to those coordinates.

 

The last time Mr. T went to McDonald's, Ronald McDonald greeted him. What occured next proved to be the most violent beating of a clown ever recorded in human history.

 

Mr. T was fired from the Psychic Friends Network for always predicting pain.

 

When the end of the world comes, it won't be referred to as "Judgment Day". Rather, it shall be called "T-Day", when Mr. T ends the world by simultaneously pitying all six billion fools on this planet to death.

 

Every time Mr. T pities the fool, a pornstar regains her virginity. Then proceeds to lose it to Mr. T.

 

Despite popular belief, if there is a fool in the woods, and nobody is around to hear his jibba jabba, Mr. T is still able to pity him.

 

During the filming of Rocky III, Burgess Meredith asked Mr. T why he wore so much gold. To make a long story short, the script had to be changed to include Mickey's "accidental" death.

 

Originally the A-Team was named T-Team and consisted of Mr. T and six of his genetically engineered clones driving around in a van made of pure gold. Producers changed the format after every criminal known to man was killed in the pilot episode.

 

Mr. T made his van go twice the speed of light because he wanted to prove that quantum physics was a bunch of jibba jabba.

 

The Manhattan Project really did not create the atom bomb, but instead put Mr. T’s pity in a bottle and then dropped it on Japan.

 

When Mr. T cuts onions, it's the onions doing the crying.

 

When Dr. Bruce Banner gets angry, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets angry, he turns into Mr. T.

 

Mr. T rejoiced as President George W. Bush was elected to office, as the coming administration would assure that he would never run out of fools to pity.

 

Mr. T took Mother Nature from behind. We refer to the event as the Big Bang.

 

If you were ever foolish enough to get into a fight with Mr. T, there would only be two hits: Mr. T hitting you, and you hitting the surface of the Sun.

 

Rome wasn't built in a day. But if Mr. T had assisted, it sure as hell would've been.

 

Mr. T invented cryogenics for the sole purpose of turning fools into Pity Pops, which he then sells to buy more gold chains.

 

The vegetarian group PETA one time tried to establish the catchprase "We PETA the fool who eats animals." Upon learning of this blatant theft of his catch phrase, Mr. T founded McDonalds.

 

Mr T defines love as the reluctance to murder. If you're still alive, it's because Mr T loves you.

[Kent]

koliko dokon treba covek da bude da iscita sve ovo???

 

 

[BodyRemover]

 

 

 

cekam da mi se skuva mleko

[Kent]

ti dam da mi iskucas 50 strana u word-u o aseizmickom projektovanju visespratnih objekata? imas pivo za to!

[BodyRemover]

ne smem pivo, imam upalu grla. sedim kuci dva dana i inhaliram paru bosiljka

 

 

to sto prekucavas... napisano rukom ili odstampano?

 

(mogu da ti pomognem, ozbiljno)

[Freak Kitchen]

Little Known Chuck Norris Facts

 

sve fore su djj!

[KRANG]

blabla

ma znam da je recenzija sranje.

i poređenje je glupo.

i ne šiju isis jednom notom.

 

ali, opet: za ovu godinu najbolji takav album, ubedljivo.

---------

mislis li na ono(g) sto ja mislim?

 

da.

haha.

 

nego... lepo vreme.. mogao si da se dovučeš, ako si stigao u bg?

 

 

jebeni sneg. pada u celom gradu.

 

osim u zemunu.

tamo ne pada, jer bi ga ugazili.

 

----------

btw, šta je ovo, svi skidaju kao ludi?

1. [ADVANCE] Panda Bear - I'm Not/Comfy in Nautica CD Single [2005/UUAR/mp3/320]

2. [ADVANCE] Love Is All - 9 Times That Same Song [2006/What's Your Rupture?/mp3/~192 (VBR)]

 

da ne skidam džabe ako je sranje..

[Kent]

panda bear je jedna polovina animal collectiv-a... imao je zanimljiv album prosle godine.

 

love is all skidaj obavezno. poliritmicni indie rock to je debi album, mada mislim da je iz 2005. (u decembru izlazi)

 

doci cu sutra, prekosutra... kad budes imao vremena vec... i kad ovaj sneg stane ili padne

 

------------------------

 

br, ma rukom je pisano, pa ja prekucavam... jebeni bojanov diplomski formule kucam u mathcadu, slike crtam u autocadu, pa zajedno sa tekstom budzim sve u wordu... muka vanzemaljska.

[Baal]

Kranže jel' uploadova ono sa fucksa?

[Kent]

@Krang:

 

Split Mono-a i World's End Girlfriend-a je sjajan. Predivne orkestracije. Bice izdat tek sredinom 2006. za Temporary Residance. Inace, WEG je Katsuhiko Maeda, priznati japanski kompozitor... Pojavljuje se i kao World's End Boyfriend i Wonderland Falling Yesterday... Imam neke njegove albume, zna da stvori bas jezivu atmosferu ubacivanjem nekih figura koje nigde nisam cuo... Probaj da nadjes treci WEG-ov, gde je napravio neki bizarni misk PR-a i elektronike.

 

World's End Girlfriend - The Lie Lay Land

[KRANG]

Kranže jel' uploadova ono sa fucksa?

ne.

ostaviću ovde kad budem.

sranje vreme, mrzelo me da idem na predavanja.

sutra verovatno.

---------------

@kent:

 

ima na IT naravno..

ali je bre 140 MB!

ima da mi nakrlja share ratio..

danas ne skidam.

treba već da skinem 200 MB danas.

World's End Girlfriend - The Lie Lay Land [2005/Midi Creative/Noble/MP3/247 (VBR)]

 

pazi ovo:

Listening to The Lie Lay Land resembles watching the films, say, by Emir Kusturica or Jan Svankmajer who portray a fleeting fantasy ludicrously and poignantly at the same time, or the films of Lars von Trier and Gaspar Noe who always sway our emotions with a relentless and extremely demanding story progression. His music, like those films, shows us a fictional world as a finished work.

 

-

haha.. kusturica --> elektro-post-rock..

kako da ne..

Edited November 21, 2005 by KRANG

[Kent]

pa vidi je l' ima na dc++ ili tako nesto.

 

i da testiramo malo taj tvoj IT, vidi sta ima od ovoga:

 

Milhaven - Bars Closing Down

My Education - 5 Popes

My Education - Italian

Ctrlaltdelete - Mondegreens

Immense - Hidden Between Sleeves

Destroyalldreamers - À Coeur Léger Sommeil Sanglan

Redjetson - New General Catalogue

Silence Kit - Silence Kit

Phobos 3 - Melody For Sleep

Monster Movie/Dreamend - Preface

Campsite - Names, Dates & Places

 

 

[Baal]

Još jedno pitanje kraaang.. Kako si ponovo dobio invitation za IT?

[Kent]

haha.. kusturica --> elektro-post-rock..

kako da ne..

procitaj malo bolje sta je napisano, pa onda zamisli neki dirty three recimo...

 

glup si.

[marcoman]

Sta sve postoji na netu, ccc.

http://web.archive.org/web/20000229104517/...om/gossip2.html

Edited November 21, 2005 by marcoman

[KRANG]

@balavi: moj IP se menja svaki put kad se konektujem. eto tako.

bwahaha. tek sam skoro to provalio. i odmah se registrovao, naravno. za invitaciju odeš na njihov irc kanal i moliš jedno 5-10 minuta...

 

@kent: ima samo Destroyalldreamers. i to sam sad stavio da se skida.

pazi, ovde trenutno ima samo 2300 aktivnih torrenta.

ali najstariji je od pre 20ak dana.

evo:

2005-10-24

17:50:47

 

dnevno se dodaje 100tinak, i briše isto toliko.

fluktuacija je ogromna, ali u određenom trenutku se ne može baš sve naći.

ali zato, sve novo što treba da izađe se može naći.

[Baal]

Majke im ga, već pola sata molim za invitation, a svi me kuliraju na IT kanalu.

[KRANG]

haha. sad ću i ja da dođem da te kuliram.

[Baal]

Veoma inteligentna rasprave se vodi na EFNetu kanal #indie.torrents

[KRANG]

pokušaj balavog da dobije invitaciju:

 

 

...<BaalBehri> pichka vam materina

<qom> I'm sure you won't get one when typing in foreign

<BaalBehri> yeah, i will suck your dick man for invitation

<BaalBehri>

<qom> I don't have one

<BaalBehri> oh, fuck

<BaalBehri> ok, i`ll have to find someone else to suck his dick for invitation.

<bargeld> BaalBehri: i invitate you to my home

<bargeld> we put on little fire

<bargeld> baby i like my arches pointed and my vaults ribbed, so get your fly buttress over here

<BaalBehri> uu it sounds great

<BaalBehri> ..or not

* BaalBehri is now known as shaban

<bargeld> by home i meant "bunker"

<shaban> erm.. yes.

<bargeld> and i meant "suck me off in the glory hole"

<krang_> haha

<krang_> hey, BaalBehrit, we don't take kindly to your types around here..

<shaban> krang is damn leecher

* shaban has quit IRC